


Yang's (Squeaky Clean) Shower Thoughts

by Kiiratam



Category: RWBY
Genre: Angst, As in just barely off screen, Canon Compliant, F/F, Implied Masturbation, Light Smut, Yang has weird coping mechanisms, Yang leans on the 4th wall
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-04
Updated: 2020-01-04
Packaged: 2021-02-27 04:02:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,825
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22110766
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kiiratam/pseuds/Kiiratam
Summary: Yang has finally put on her Atlesian arm. It's still new and unfamiliar to her, but she's going to take the time to become more acquainted with it.Takes place in Volume 4, somewhere between Chapters 4 and 9. (My BMBLB fic index)The explicit version ishere.
Relationships: Blake Belladonna/Yang Xiao Long
Comments: 8
Kudos: 22





	Yang's (Squeaky Clean) Shower Thoughts

It had taken months, but Yang finally had the house to herself. Not that she'd wanted an empty house at first. And even now, she'd gladly trade her few hours of privacy for a full house again. Her dad and Zwei would be back from Signal at the end of the day, once the first day of classes was over. Beacon may have fallen, but the world still needed Huntresses and Huntsmen.

  
Like Ruby. Who had left over the winter. Not before giving Yang a final chance to tell her that she loved her. Not that Yang had spotted the opportunity for what it was. Yang hadn't even noticed that Ruby was leaving. Just turned away, lost in her own misery.

  
Yang swabbed the sweat from her brow, and levered herself to her feet. Time for a shower. She started for the kitchen door.

  
She had finally put it on. The new arm. Her new arm. She'd made that much progress. And her dad was still kicking her butt, sometimes literally, and Yang knew that she still had a long way to go, just to catch up to where she'd been. But she was on her feet again, not drowning, not crawling her way out. Standing, walking, picking up the pace. One day at a time, one step at time. Getting back up to speed, catching up to her sister... Yang was working on it.

  
Today had just been her trying to adjust to her new arm. Running through her katas, beating up the bag, and trying to get her footwork bouncy again, after weeks mostly spent in bed.

  
Yang had even done some weight training, digging her old dumb-bells out of her closet. Yang had been spoiled by the weight rooms at Signal and Beacon. She was beginning to see the advantage of her dad's isometric exercises, at least whenever she didn't have a weight room. Over dinner, she'd have to plan out a new routine with his help. Maybe tag along some days to Signal, use their weight room. Heck, if Zwei could TA, she certainly could.

  
If they'd let her. Yang had gone into town a few times, and had caught some disapproving looks. If she'd thought that her frame-up had been forgotten with the fall of Beacon...

  
Ruby had told her about her suspicions - that Emerald, Mercury's team-mate, had some kind of illusion power. That Coco had seen strange things when she fought Emerald. And then some Atlas tech had gone through all the footage frame-by-frame, seeing inconsistencies, seeing metal fragments when Yang broke Mercury's leg...

  
Atlas had published the real story. At least as far as they knew. It was a few paragraphs, buried in a few pages about their steps to patch the holes in their security network, amid excuses and obfuscation about Penny. They'd theorized that Emerald had used her powers on Pyrrha, too, because the footage had her reacting to threats that weren't there.

  
Yang had read the whole thing. She didn't think many other people had. And if they had, it was fighting against what people had seen. With their own eyes.

  
Maybe after a year, she'd stop getting the looks. But a few dirty looks were a small price, really. Yang was alive, she'd been technically exonerated, and Atlas had given her a new arm. She'd made out better than Pyrrha.

  
Focusing on her breathing - _in, hold, out_ \- Yang scrubbed at her face with the towel. She squeezed her eyes shut, trying not to think. Just breathe.

  
Blinking a few times to clear her eyes, Yang started up the stairs to her room.

  
The new arm still didn't feel right. She'd only been wearing it for a week. But it just wasn't fitting into her Aura. It wasn't her yet. It was responding fine - she'd have to work on precision, but at least part of that was that synthetic materials didn't act like skin. Yang really didn't want to try to knead dough with it. But it wasn't like her bread had ever really been super successful before. It was just bread. No big loss.

  
She stopped, fingers - her real ones - tightening on the banister. _To heck with just accepting that. I'm making bread tonight._

  
But - Yang took the last few steps up - she was going to shower first. And maybe take advantage of her privacy a bit.

  
She still wasn't sleeping well. Adam kept showing up in her dreams. Unless she was too tired to dream, or her brain took another turn, and found someplace safer. The good part about trying to get back in shape was that it was exhausting.

  
The other good thing about it was that she'd found her libido again. 'Found.' Like Yang had just misplaced it for a couple of months. As opposed to what had actually happened. Having it buried under a mountain of pain, and misery, and guilt, and failure... She hadn't exactly meant to extract it, but it had apparently been tied up with Real Yang.

  
Real Yang. As opposed to Old Yang, Who, Current Yang was pretty certain, was dead. At least as much as anything in the past died. But when Old Yang had died, she'd been interred with Real Yang (and her libido), until Current Yang could dig them out. Of course, Real Yang had also made Current Yang into Current Yang, from Miserable Yang, and-

  
...Yang was pretty sure she'd gotten lost somewhere in that idiom. She certainly didn't want to try to dig through it again. The important part was, she'd been getting increasingly horny all week. And here Yang was, still sweaty from practice, with a house that would be empty for hours yet. Free to take a nice, long, relaxing shower.

  
She stripped off her work-out clothes, and tossed them in the hamper. It wouldn't be like Beacon at all, where Yang had to keep quiet, even in the middle of the night.

  
The raven outside her window blinked at her, and flew off.

  
"Yeah, you'd better run. It's going to get a little loud." Yang slapped her own butt, cupping her palm to make the impact louder. She dug into her underwear drawer, pulling out her smaller, bright purple dildo. After a couple of hours of hard training, she was willing to go a little easy on herself. Yang could work back up to the other one. But for now, it was the same as everything else. Start small.

  
Really, that Easy Sunday and Big Dreams had made it back from Beacon was remarkable. Yang didn't remember leaving either one in her toiletries bag, but they had both been there. Along with her vibrator. And Yang distinctly remembered shoving her vibrator into the back of her underwear drawer, after she learned that she couldn't use it, even in the dead of night.

  
Yang shoved some memories off the Good Vibes Express train, before they could derail the entire thing. She was going to go take a shower, and masturbate furiously. And she was going to be the only one involved - no elaborate fantasies, just Easy Sunday and a multi-month dry spell to break.

  
_Heck, has it really been months? Time has been weird._

  
She grabbed a towel, and walked down the hall towards the bathroom. Sashayed, really, with an exaggerated sway to her hips. _This is supposed to be fun, yeah? I remember fun. I'll laugh at my own ridiculousness, if I want to._

  
Yang left the bathroom door open. Partially because the bathroom fan was broken, and partially so Yang could delight in how no one was going to interrupt her. Weiss was up in Atlas, after all. Maybe she'd be struck with a certainty that she ought to be somewhere, interrupting. Like she always did. Quite a lot of context was bodily hurled from the Good Vibes Express.

  
As much as Yang just wanted to jam the throttle open, she made herself go slow. _Warm up, train, cool down. Same as everything else._ Slow, in this case, was actually taking a shower. Maybe bouncing a bit more than usual, to a song in her head. She sang out the odd riff from it, nothing compelling, just a decent beat, distracting herself.

  
_Lather up, rinse off. Dirty Yang, clean Yang._ "Metal Yang!" She threw out some power chords on an air guitar. _Hair over here, hair down there, hair pretty much everywhere. Heck, I like my hair. I just wish it didn't take so long to wash. Or dry._

  
She got soap in her eyes, and held her face under the showerhead to flush it out. And, because Yang had seen this exact scene in she-didn't-even-know-how-many horror movies, made a rude gesture at any monsters sneaking up on her. Once she could see again, and had confirmed that there wasn't an oozing monstrosity lurching through the door, Yang grabbed Easy Sunday from the sink.

  
_Probably not going to eaten, in my shower, with my dildo._ "Least not until I justify the 'adults only' rating." Yang snorted, and held her dildo up in front of her mouth. "Testes, testes, one two three. Mic check. Is this thing on? I'd like to thank my devoted fans." _There, that ought to be too meta for horror._

  
Yang kissed the tip of Easy Sunday. "Been a while. You remember what to do?" She waggled it up and down, in a nod. "Okay, then."

* * *

"Blake! Oh, heck! Blake! Yes! Oh, gods, yes! Blake!"

  
By the time Yang could actually use her brain again, she'd almost slid down the drain, with how boneless she felt.

  
The spray of the shower managed to keep her conscious. Yang struggled to her knees in its path, laboriously rinsing off a fresh layer of sweat.

  
She shut the shower off, and dragged herself up, with the wall's help, to reach her towel. 

  
_I've never orgasmed so hard. Nearly knocked myself out._

  
Yang started drying herself off.

  
_So much for owning my orgasm._

  
_It's only been a few months. And it's not like I masturbated to anything **but** Blake for two semesters. _

  
_She left me._

  
_She left me with pieces. I can make myself again out of the pieces. I can get past her. Over her._

  
_I don't want to._

  
_I never got to say good-bye._

  
_I never got to say I loved her._

  
_I never will._

  
_She left me. She must have had her reasons. Even if I can't see them. She's gone her own way._

  
_I have to go mine._

  
_But I don't have to forget her._

  
_I won't. I promise, I won't._

  
Picking up Easy Sunday, Yang headed back to her room. She looked down at her new arm.

  
_I can't believe it, but my Aura is fitting better already. It's more a part of me. I wonder if I can add a few mods, maybe change the color..._

  
_I should find a bread recipe for tonight._

  
_One day at a time. Keep moving forward._


End file.
